ScannerJockey's Profile

Banja Luka has an Ikea?

I can vouch for the Applaro set from Ikea. If you get the matching folding chairs, the whole set folds up small enough to fit in a hall closet. Plus it has held together nicely after seven years on a balcony.

This home is beautiful (and, major bonus points for being in my hometown).

But I agree with Dyani that AT has been featuring a lot of suburban megahomes in lieu of actual apartments and other small homes. I like to see house tours in which challenges are overcome - small space, minimal storage, weird layout - to create a beautiful home. It inspires me to live simply and with a small footprint. I'm not as interested in suburban tract houses which are relatively easy to decorate, and lead to gridlock and waste of natural resources.

Oh, and regarding weddings, we got around that issue pretty easily. Our venue was a pub! So our website said something like, "Please note that [venue] is licensed as a tavern and all guests must be 21 and over. While children are a joy and a blessing, we unfortunately will not be able to accommodate them at the reception. If you are coming from out of town, we can offer babysitting recommendations."

We had a squawk or two, but really...anybody who wants to bring their baby to a bar has deeper issues than we can manage.

I've lived in three apartments in the same building. I moved into a studio in 2006 and stayed there for about three and a half years. When my income improved, and the walls started to close in, I pulled up stakes in 2009 for a one-bedroom in the same building. Then I got married, and after more than a year in that small one-bedroom our options were a larger place or murder-suicide. So we packed up and headed for a two-bedroom that had just opened up.

It's definitely worth it. I need things to be neat and organized, and my husband never throws anything away. So it's best for us both to move on to a larger space as needed, like a hermit crab getting a new shell.

And the moves themselves weren't so bad. We didn't have to rent a truck or hire movers, we didn't have to go to crazy packing things up, and we didn't have to get across town. Instead, it was a college-style move of a few friends who were paid in pizza and beer and it never took longer than an hour or two.

Pets? No. Not permitted in my home, and it's not rude at all of me to say no to that request. It's a violation of my lease, and I don't like animals. They slobber, jump, break things and make me sneeze. However, I'm happy to suggest a hotel that permits animals.

Any pet owner who doesn't understand that, or believes they have the right to bring their pet into other's homes, is probably an irresponsible pet owner or at the very least has an entitlement problem. When you get a pet, you have to realize it means you have responsibility to another living thing and that will limit your life somewhat.

I hate folding/putting away laundry and unloading the dishwasher. I feel like my stuff is clean, so why am I still working?

I think being sure it's a good idea to move in with a significant other, and discussing what it means for the relationship, BEFORE the boxes get packed is a great way to help living together go more smoothly. So it is germane to the subject.

The way I see it is, if someone posted, "I want to decorate a nursery with shards of glass," posters should be able to respond to that without hearing a lot of pearl-clutching about "rudeness." Responding with, "I'd use green instead of clear glass," isn't the most helpful response, while, "Are you sure that's a good idea?" is.

As Pi put it more succinctly, "I don't think anyone is saying cohabitation before marriage is a bad idea, only that many people do it without considering the full committment of living with someone and their stuff and their baggage and the shared responsibilities."

I have seen way too many friends move in with an SO because they think it will be an adorable real time rom-com, or because they think an engagement will be just around the corner, or because they want to save on rent and think the details will work themselves out. Before packing even one box, you need a plan. What does this mean for the relationship? Do we plan on marrying? If so, when? Will we just live together forever? At what point do we throw in the towel? How do we divide our belongings and decide who keeps the apartment? What if there is an unplanned pregnancy (for opposite-sex couples), which is far from rare among cohabitating couples?

Agree with beatrix. Usually after eating, I am stuffed, a little sleepy, and I just want to relax on the couch and have a friendly conversation. But every gathering has that one person who just loooooooves to play games and will hassle you about it endlessly. I despise Mandatory Fun with a burning passion.

That said, if it's a game night I'm usually in. I like games that don't take very long and don't require learning a ton of rules, like Catchphrase. Bonus: it's easily turned into a drinking game! I'm not a fan of Trivial Pursuit because people will nerd out and debate answers for-freaking-EVER and it totally kills the mood.

To build on what Eeeesa said, it's really important to have a conversation about how much alone time you need. This goes for both platonic roommates and couples. If you can't compromise and work out a system, the person who needs more alone time is going to feel frustrated and grumpy, and the person who needs less alone time is going to feel ignored.